Are you a lifestyle submissive... or do you just like kinky play?

by Mistress Catharine / katy

Are you a lifestyle submissive.. or do you just like kinky play? This is a question We often ask. For some reason….many people don't seem to understand what We are asking or realize what the difference is. We define the difference as: a lifestyle submissive is one who enjoys and desires to serve, and actually be of service to their dominant outside of a sexual scene.. We routinely task Our submissives for example.. they do things like help Us with this website, devotional mantras, and household chores. Our submissives help make Our life better.. they save Us time and generally make Our life more pleasant. Now I do admit that We usually try and make these tasks as enjoyable as possible.. they are often in some type of bondage when doing the chores and have some pretty "hot" research projects but they would still do them regardless. Our submissives desire to please Us and desire Our happiness, fulfillment and contentment and not only during a scene. The thought of the dominant's pleasure turns on a submissive and although they have their own tastes and kinks that they enjoy more than other kinks, they would not dream to dictate a scene. A submissive is attentive to the dom. Does being a submissive mean he or she holds no opinions…. Or is submissive to all other people? Certainly not. In fact, We have found that the most submissive submissives are often very much in control in other areas of their lives.. they are often over -achievers. A lifestyle submissive chooses to give submission by free choice.. not by coercion or by sexual bribes.

On the other hand.. there are men and women who are NOT submissive.. outside a sexual scene, they don't want to be bothered with all the tasking stuff.. they just want to have some kinky fun, perhaps even really feel submissive for a short while for a thrill, but want to leave the submissive stuff in the bedroom. They don't want all the work involved.. all the effort.. they just want to have some fun! And you know what? There is nothing wrong with just being kinky.. but it should not be confused with being a lifestyle submissive. The best Mistress for this type of sub is a pro domme.. She will not expect any effort/work other than paying her. It is a great solution for those who don't want to go to the lengths of being a lifestyle submissive. What if you are a kinky female player who wants to scene without the bother so to speak? Just put out an online ad saying so.. and We promise you will have more responses than you can handle..

Some people wonder why anybody would want to be lifestyle submissive when they could just be a kinky player and have fun. The answer is easy..a submissive gets something that it is impossible for a mere kinky player to get…. a trade.. for the devotion and attentiveness that a lifestyle submissive shows the dominant, the dominant in turn tries to anticipate and meet the submissives needs and desires. There is a bond between true lifestylers (both dom and sub) that is just not there in a pro-domme situation. I know that We as dominants cherish and appreciate Our submissives.. We try Our best to keep their best interests in mind..to help them grow as submissives and human beings, to help them overcome fears and phobias and explore their desires. We do this so Our fondest wish can be realized .. so that when We do part ways .. they will be better for having been in Our Circle.. for having been Our subs..

So.. which one are you?