OPINIONS

Thoughts On Switching

by Mistress Catharine /katy

I am a switch.. I am a sub but ONLY to my life partner Maitre Pierre, we have been living together for a few years now..I am also a domme, together we have several long term subs. Note I say I am a domme.. I am not a top sub.. there is a difference..I am not a pretend domme, nor am I a pretend sub.. I am a switch.. which mean a real domme and a real sub.. just as a submissive is not submissive to the whole world.. (least I hope not, cause the world would eat them up!)I choose when and to whom to be submissive and when not to be.. just like any submissive does. I am also dominant.. many submissives are dominant in parts of their lives.. be it at work.. or in the role of authority over their children for instance.. People dont seem to have a problem with a submissive being a boss at work.. they dont seem to think they are "less" of a sub. yet.. many people I talk to seem to have a problem to reconcile the fact that I am both a dom and a sub.. because I dont fit neatly into one category or another.. they dont know how to treat me... well.. here goes.. treat me with respect and courtesy.. even if I was not a switch and only a sub.. I am not YOUR sub, and you dont have the right to order me to do a darn thing..and my being a sub does not make you superior to me thanks.. (but then I dont think that being submissive means being inferior) if it confuses you so much.. think of me as a domme. Whether I am a sub or a domme, or a switch should make no difference to anybody except those that are in a relationship with me.. by this I mean Maitre Pierre and our submissives.

I find that many people like to pigeon hole others (I think it makes their little world seem safe).. and think that if their vision of bdsm or their sexuality is not the same as others, then that the other people dont get it.. Because you may not have the urge to play both sides of dom and sub, does not mean that I dont "get" what being a submissive or a domme is all about.. in fact.. I DO get it.. I have been actively in this lifestyle for twenty years (shit that makes me sound old!!!). I am not searching for my identity or trying to figure out what side of the equation I am on... I found I like both sides.. and feel I do both well.. I have an understanding of both sides and a love for both sides.. but when I am sub. I am a sub with all my heart.. and when I look into eyes of my own subs.. I know that they know I am all domme to them.. and yet.. switching seems to be a dirty word.. any thoughts on why so many look at switching so negatively? how do you feel about it? do switches make you uncomfortable? do you feel that switches make good subs and or doms? any thoughts?

 

ŠTHE BDSM CIRCLE 2003